Today morning I met TT after my Yoga class.Early in the morning, I like to keep to myself.
TT walked up and said,"Hi!Your friend had come. Her daughter has stopped coming for classes(G)."
I glared.
TT," She is a lazy girl".
" But what you did was wrong. How can you..."
TT," Arrey, you don`t know these parents. They only want marks and if the child doesn`t perform, toh meri gardan pakadte hain(They hold me responsible).We can`t raise our hand so how do you discipline them? You have to scare them, nahi toh sar par chad jaayenge."
"Yes , but this is no way. You can`t demean a child.."
TT cuts in," What demean? They are so chalu.. You know if they don`t listen then finally my sister handles them".
"What do you mean..handles them?"
TT ,"She walks them to the police station and tells them that if they don`t study then they will broom the police station. That gets them cracking. And anyways ,I have 30 children coming for tuitions. In the past 2 years G is the second child who has opted out. What to do ,some parents have ego issues. Let them find their way out."
I am speechless.
TT, ' See you. Have to rush. Got a class."
I stand on the road with mixed feelings. I am digusted with myself for not firing her. And soon a feeling of utter helplessness spreads over. The attitude of parents, the education system, our obsession with marks..I am bugged because I realise that there is a grain of truth in what TT said.
19 comments:
:( And in the whole grind, its the child jo pis jaata hai :(
Yes, right. Perhaps parents do have issues. Perhaps you were also right in feeling helpless in not blasting her then and there. However, if I were in your place, I would have shared with her the anguish that we bloggers shared with you after your last post on the issue.
Oh my god! Thats horrible! Part of me is really really glad I din't study in India if this is what education has come down to!
@aneri,sunshine...it is a sad state :-(
Mampi..the conversation lasted 2 minits max..and though i wanted to scream at her, a part of me saw her point of view. She is also forced to resort to such punishments because she has no alternative. I did tell her that a teacher is a failure if she has to resort to such means. And she said, well most of the parents are happy that their kids are scared..kissi se to darte hain..
Having said that , I still wish I had stopped and given her a earful!
Somewhere i failed too..
There is no point in blasting teacher only, this is commercial world, everything is driven by money, parents want children to dtudy higher, not becuase they want them to gain knowledge or anything, but so as to get them good jobs..means the job where pay scale is good, they want teachers to help in child getting good marks, they are not interested in knowing the details..if there child is not doing well....how cud it be they are giving QUALITY TIME.I know many parents who go to any length for their child to get good rank, seen them coaxing and helping the ward in copying.and they are not at fault completely,in this world only Rank matters, rank and wealth.
This whole system sucks...teill we start giving due importance to virtues, not lakshmi..it will remain so
My mom says, think before commenting on others. Be in their shoes first. The parents who are working and have no flexible timings to take care of the children, tend to send even small kids for tuition - just to make them finish off their home work and brush them up for their next day's classes. They take them home after work, eat, sleep. No time for anything else - no chatting about the school or the tuition class, nothing. Everyone is busy. These parents have to depend on the TTs. Otherwise look out for the next TT. That place should be convenient for them to drop the kids ... so many things are there. The TT's point of view - if she doesn't make the children to get good marks, she will not get students/money. This is a vicious cycle. On the whole, I pity the children. Poor things. And the working mothers also - no way out of this. If you want to live comfortably, both of them have to work and the woman is expected to take all the responsibility, esp. here, in India. God help our mothers and children!
Hmmmm....quite understood ur dilemma. Hopefully the parents will wake up & do something abt it.
Personally I hope somebody forces her to a police station & makes her sweep it so tht she can really understand the meaning of "humiliation":-S.
//They only want marks and if the child doesn`t perform, toh meri gardan pakadte hain// Either she accepts a student and teaches him to the best of the child's potential or she refuses the child. Where does abusing come into it?
She is charging them for providing a service, if she cannot teach them without abusing them, she is cheating the parents, the children (and herself).
Many children don't tell their parents, and many children and parents accept this as the right method of teaching.
It's true that the education system in India is *&^%$ but what stops this TT from doing her job sincerely?
And what does she mean by //We can`t raise our hand so how do you discipline them? // Doesn't she know it is against the law to raise or hand or abuse a child while teaching...but then such tuition centres have to be tackled by the parents, by simply rejecting them.
In rural India thousands of children drop out of schools because of such, and worse, abuse.
Just the thought of someone treating a child like this makes me angry. And they do it like they are doing a favour to the child.
@renu..the world is obssesed with marks..knowledge and learning are no longer their goals.
@Sandhya..it is a vicious circle..it is tough to blame only one.. the system,parents or teachers.
@Reflection..I hope so too..but just see the numbers..out of 30 only 2 protested..as in they dropped out.
@IHM..there is a saying in hindi..Zulm karne se zyaada kharab hain Zulm sehna...the initial step has to come from parents..
Yes, that is why I blame the parents more than the teachers. They (the teachers) wouldn't be able to get away with this stuff if the parents didn't let them. The thing is parents don't "parent" these days and expect someone else - a teacher, grandparents, uncles or aunts - to do the job for them. I am speaking from experience. And in this whole fiasco, children are the ones who lose out. If this mother had stood up for her child, instead of just pulling her out of the class quietly, the teacher might have had different things to say. I am not taking the blame away from the teachers - they should show responsibility if the paretns won't do it. But the parents are the ones I expect to be protecting their children. And like Indian Homemaker, I too think a 10 year old has no business going to a tuition. At that age, parents can easily teach/help their own kid at home. Goes back to the "parents not parenting" argument.
Arti, I have left a Tag for yoy on my bog. Please pick that up.
"love is the one who masrers all things."
Mawlãnã Rumi...for you...
hey, where are you? been a while.. no posts :(
hi ..I lost my MIL on sunday..in mourning..please pray for her..see you all when I see you..
So sorry to know about ur MIl, may her soul rest in peace and May god give you the strength to bear the loss !
So sorry to hear this sad news....u tek double care, everybody will need u at times like this.
Come back when u r ready...we'll wait:-)
Grrrrrr! So inhuman these teachers can be!
u know what? i look at it from TT's perspective. DO we have children who wnt to learn? How do we teach them? Through fear, through inspiration, through pressure. TT chose to demonstrate what the girl will do if she does not study. What would u have liked TT to do? Tell the girl its ok, do ur homework now and go home late? Honestly, what would u like TT to do?
just read ur comments and saw that thankfully, G does not go to tuition any more. If G does not need extra tuition, no reason wny she should get it.
My parents believed firmly that i will not score on self study, It took me 4 years of topping the class to convince them that i could study on my own.
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